Make Burbanked’s birthday wish come true, Day One: regift me an Oscar!
By Burbanked on Dec 22, 2008 in Blogging, Movies | 1,558 views |
So here I am celebrating Burbanked’s third birthday and it occurs to me that my chances of getting an actual present for this occasion are mighty slim. Seriously, no one I know truly celebrates blog-birthdays outside of their own sites and each time I bring it up with friends and family I just get a collective rolling of the eyeballs.
Instead, I figure that I’ll bring my neediness and gluttony to you, the faithful and stalwart Burbanked readership, to service my birthday needs. You’re the ones hanging around here for some reason after three years, so I figure that it’s time I truly take advantage of your goodwill.
So for the next three days, I will call upon three of my blogging pals to grant three of my birthday wishes. Each day I’ll tag you with my wish, which you can do with what you will. Write a post, write a comment, write me an email, or otherwise convey to me how you’ll make my wish come true.
For today’s birthday wish, I want you to regift me an Oscar.
Everyone’s got an Oscar complaint, and some reach much deeper than others. In any given year, some terrific movie, director, actor or cinematographer gets the royal shaft from the Academy, and I’d like you to take the occasion of your biggest Oscar injustice…and regift it to me.
Piper, Ray, Adam? I’m talking to you here. Tell me the story of your most monstrous Oscar grievance and find a way to make it all better for me. Give the Oscar to someone more deserving for that year; tell me what you’d say or do to the unjustified Oscar winner; simply tell me why I deserve the Oscar more than the poor miserable sap who actually won it originally. It doesn’t have to be fancy; just regift the Oscar somehow and let me know how you’d do it.
Naturally, anyone else out there should feel free to play along as well. I will gleefully accept any and all birthday gifts offered, regardless of size, color, style, and/or level of profanity.
© Copyright
Piper | Dec 22, 2008 | Reply
Alan,
I will grant you this wish. Do I write it here or on my own blog and link it back to you. And let me do you a favor and wait until after the holidays because I’m blaming my low attendance on that. Either that or I’ve offended a great number of people about something that I wrote.
But look at me. It’s your birthday and I’m trying to call the shots. You tell me when and where and I’ll be there.
Burbanked | Dec 22, 2008 | Reply
@Piper: Either way’s okay. Comment here or post at LET (that’s your site, BTW). If you choose to use your precious blogging real estate for little old me, now I can’t really complain, can I?
Adam R | Dec 22, 2008 | Reply
Here’s to three more years! And with that said I’m re-gifting you the 1968 Best Picture Oscar — in the height of one of Hollywood’s best eras, we get “Oliver!” as the winner, without “2001: A Space Odyssey” even being nominated. Yes, we want “morrrrre!”
Ray | Dec 22, 2008 | Reply
Here ya go, you attention-seeking whore:
I hope you choke on it LOL
Love,
Ray
Burbanked | Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
@Adam: that’s a head-scratcher all right. I wonder if some of those Academy members were still around in 2003 when Chicago won?
@Ray: thanks, pal. I figured it’d be a good bet to give you an assignment where you were encouraged to free the rage-beast a little!
Piper | Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
Happy Birthday my friend.
Please accept this gift.
Burbanked | Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
@Piper: NICE. I once tried to get Costner to autograph a Dances With Wolves script as a gift I was putting together for my sister-in-law, but I got celebrity-blocked by his Nazi development team. I probably should have offered peanut brittle, but I didn’t know then what I know now.
Thanks, Piper!
Sulu at the Helm | Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
This is a great idea, and I love all the re-gifted choices. Even though I don’t run own fancy blog I’d like to suggest a re–gifted Oscar. Can we all just get over the bloated, chick-flick epic “Titanic” and give that best picture Oscar to …anything else? Granted 1997 wasn’t the strongest year for movies, but I’d much rather have seen “L.A. Confidential” walk away with the award. Three and a half hours of laughable dialog, stereotyped characters and that gag-inducing Celine Dion were more than any man should have to take.. “The Godfather” was reissued that year. Would it have been so wrong to hand it another Oscar?
Burbanked | Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
@Sulu: An excellent idea. It’s fascinating (and not surprising) to me that in each of these regifting cases, the movie that got ditched by Oscar is the one that retains its high regard by film fans for years afterward. You’ll find few recent thought-pieces on Titanic or Dances With Wolves, but LA Confidential? Or Goodfellas? The web is crowded with ‘em.
You may not run a fancy blog, Sulu, but stop by tomorrow. You might be given a task as well.
Sulu at the Helm | Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
Will do. Choices like Dances and Titanic reflect the complete lack of inspiration or imagination those voting on the Oscars have. These movies are “safe” choices – big box office plus historical setting plus good reviews from mainstream reviewers equals Oscar. No wonder people have quit watching the Oscars – the selections for best picture are as bloated and boring as the show. I say we call “shenanigans” on 1997, let Cameron and crew count the 700 million bazillion dollars their little boat move made and give the Oscar to Shawshank. Then again, do we want to saddle one of the best-love films ever with the rep of an “Oscar winner” when really it was filmophiles like the rest of us who discovered and rediscovered it?
Too too Badeenie | Dec 23, 2008 | Reply
I never liked that piper man, but i do now. He is damn funny with that kevin lazy eye thing. I bet he gets a lot of babes. i wish you had 3 girlies.
Vincent | Feb 2, 2009 | Reply
This is going back a bit, but how about 1936 Best Actress? Luise Rainer won for “The Great Ziegfeld” despite having a relatively small part, and was helped by the MGM voting bloc which did Louis B. Mayer’s bidding — and moreover, she would win (and more deservingly so) the following year for “The Good Earth,” so it’s not as if we’re depriving her. Instead, award the ‘36 Oscar to Carole Lombard for “My Man Godfrey,” arguably the definitive screwball comedy performance.