This must be a new record – Indiana Jones updates have officially run out of steam.

Clearly when a story on Yahoo Movie News is headlined “Ford Can Still Fit Into Indy’s Trousers”, you have to know that they’re begging for your attention and that you’re not going to get much useful information if you’re silly enough – like I was – to follow the link.

We’ve only just begun to see the regular and feverish updating of news and non-news surrounding the long-awaited and hotly-debated next installment of the Indiana Jones franchise, but if the updates continue in this kind of vein – absolutely useless and dull – then we’re in for a long and boring year indeed.

Part of me hopes that this indicates a willingness and capability on the part of Spielberg and company to hold things back, to keep story spoilers and set locations and spy reports to a minimum so that we can get to the actual movie opening next May and not have the whole thing spoiled in advance, such as in the case of other long-awaited and hotly-debated franchises of late – but I suppose it’s too early still to tell.

You’re certainly welcome to follow the link to the Yahoo story, or you can get a good idea of its extreme boring boreness here:

“I have to say, [Ford] looks amazing,” said Kathleen Kennedy, the film’s co-executive producer, along with George Lucas. “He looks fantastic in the outfit.”

Actually, Ford knew the hat would still fit but wondered if he could still squeeze into the pants. He did.

So are we supposed to believe that these are the actual pants from Last Crusade 18 years ago? Spielberg’s wardrobe department didn’t think to create something as innovative as a new and rare version of khaki pants? Or are these even more extraordinary, a pair of 1981-era pants that have been magically preserved and require a team of assistants to stuff Harrison Ford into them?

Or is it more likely that the writers at AP/Yahoo are simply beating a bad metaphor to a painful death?

(screenshot above courtesy of TheRaider.net)