No disrespect to Zod, but Burbanked would like to offer some alternative villains for Superman to fight.

Of course you’ve heard by now that Jude Law is rumored to be considering the role of General Zod in the next installment of Bryan Singer’s more or less revitalized Superman franchise. And you may also have read that some people feel as though this is a valid idea worth further discussion.

And although we welcome and honor the opinions of everyone, everywhere, all of the time, we think it really blows.

Singer needs to leave the Donner movies alone now and move ahead without the Super Training Wheels. Having Lex Luthor as the villain the first time out was inevitable, an obligatory convention and nod to the ‘78 film that Singer chose to respect with such brilliant - and, at times, such heart-crushingly dull - cinematic droolery (And again we ask: why exactly does Lex Luthor need a girlfriend?).

But we’ve had enough homage, now, thanks. Zod was a good villain, but that was 1980 and no one truly wants to see this like this.

So to that end, Burbanked would like to suggest some alternative, far more formidable, villains with whom Superman would be proud to throw down:

1. The Transformers - if only so that he could destroy every single one of them from Optimus to Bumblebee to Megatramoron and we could all just shut up about it.
2. John McClane - while technically not a villain, at least I Thought I Told You to Die Hard, You Super Mothereffer would be a better title than this piece of dookie.
3. Woody Allen - because he doesn’t feel pity, or remorse. And he absolutely will not stop, ever, until we’re all bored.
4. Dark Phoenix - but the real one, not the one from that recent movie who basically stood around looking angry and then was killed with the equivalent of a nasty steak knife wound.
5. The Tabloid Media - think about it: wouldn’t the paparazzi follow Superman everywhere? Wouldn’t it be great to see just how annoyed he would get?
6. Ellen Ripley - because you really just never know what’s going to come out of there.
7. Godzilla - believe me, someone’s probably already thought of this.
8. The entire city of Toledo - seriously; what would happen if an entire city decided to take on Superman? He couldn’t possibly fight everyone at the same time, right? And what if they brought monster trucks?
9. Marsellus Wallace - he may be just an earthling, but he knows exactly how to handle pliers and a blow torch.
10. The Fifth Element - admit it: your inner dork just shivered a little.
11. All of the Baldwin brothers - because crazy people don’t fight fair.

Mr. Singer, Warner Bros.: clearly you’ve got your work cut out for you. Choose wisely.